When women are describing their dream mate, what is it they say – ??? Tall, dark, handsome, and non-communicative – right??? The sad truth is, most women don’t think much about how well a man can communicate, either verbally or non-verbally. We find out after we marry just how important that quality is! Frankly, in my humble opinion… communication IS everything!
There’s a choice I had to make in college that I think may have altered the course of my life. No, it’s true. I had to choose between debate and interpersonal communication. Well, no way was I going to get up in front of a bunch of talented speakers and try my hand at debate as a freshman! It was a no-brainer… interpersonal communication, here I come! I don’t think I did myself a favor by going that way. I should have thrown my shoulders back and charged ahead. Now, I wish I would have; however, it does absolutely no good to second guess a decision that I made so long ago.
When one introvert meets and marries another introvert… communication can be a bit sketchy for a while. I’ve coined a phrase and use it often:
I am not a mind reader. I’ve never been a mind reader. I’ll never BE a mind reader. Use your words so I will know what is going on.
Every decision as a couple needs to be discussed — not just the big ones. It’s a matter of respect for one another. With every year that passes, communication gets easier – you find your own way, and every couple communicates differently. As long as it works – hey – that’s what matters!
Dear God, we know that marriage can be tricky sometimes because there are two people to consider. Two sets of values, emotions, and baggage carried around from the past. Help us to be considerate of one another and respectful in our decision-making. Help us to make all moves together as a unit instead of as an individual. You have declared that married couples are ONE. Remind us, as only You can, that what You have joined together, no one can tear apart. Thank You for being so good to us. We love you, Lord. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
Sometimes it helps to think about a couple that you really admire – and try to mirror some of their actions in your own marriage. I loved being around my parents. Those two could just give one another a look and they’d know and understand each other. I want that in my marriage – and I think that’s the goal of most couples. It’s those unspoken moments that we cherish the most, I think. The smiles, grins, silly faces… I love to remember all that!
Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away. – 1 Corinthians 13:4-8
I’ll bet I could have been a great in debate class… I hold my own fairly well on facebook! Ha! Does that count???
Today is Superbowl Sunday, of course. I have one thought to share about it.
One more example of a big decision… to get excited about Jesus, or get excited about football. Is there room for both? Well, yes, of course there’s room for both in our lives. I’m still angered by the behavior of the players, so will not be watching the Superbowl this year. I’d rather get excited about Jesus. He never lets me down! 🙂