On a September afternoon long ago, I was made aware of butterflies. I knew that God sent miracles on request because He loves us. Today is BUTTERFLY AWARENESS DAY!!! Thank You, God, for butterflies and the joy they bring.
In those moments where I’ve thought, ‘I need a sign,’ a butterfly appears, whether it’s a real one, an image on a T-shirt or a tattoo on a waiter’s neck. – Roma Downey
I spent a week with my mom in the hospital. On high doses of morphine for pain, she was blissfully unaware of anything, sleeping. I sat and thought, “This is it. I have to say goodbye now.” I put Vaseline on her lips once in a while and tried to focus on a book. I think I read each page about ten times. I couldn’t think about what I was reading. My mama was dying, and my life was about to change in so many ways.
Prayer: The world’s greatest wireless connection. – @JesusGraces on Twitter
You know, those phone calls you get at 3 am? Those phone calls are never the Publisher’s Clearing House letting you know you won. They are never good news. No – and if someone passes in the night, what good does it really do to wake the family while they are sleeping and fortunately unaware of what has transpired? Can this news not wait until the next morning? At any rate, the phone call came. My mother went home.
Her home going celebration was simple, as she wanted. She was never one for fancy doings. I knew what to do because she told me many times. What dress she wanted to be buried in and what kind of flowers to order. It was as if I was just carrying out the orders she’d given me. I did it without much effort because I was so numb. I tried not to think about the fact that I’d never get to have a talk over tea with her again on this earth. I couldn’t think about that. There would be time to grieve later. Right now – details. I have to attend to the details. It must be right. I had to make her proud.
At the viewing, friends and family were kind. I just kept thinking I wanted to jump in that casket with her. Dive right in there and go with her. They frown on that though – turns out those caskets are made for one. They don’t do twofer funerals. So I moved on to plan B. Wait… what was plan B? Oh… well – prayer. I prayed. I prayed for a sign.
I am so sad today. Would you mind just sending me a small sign to let me know that You are here and that you still love me – and that mama’s ok? Thank You! In Jesus’ name, Amen.
God answered that little prayer. I looked up from praying and saw some turquoise blue butterflies right around the bouquet of turquoise blue hydrangeas I arranged in a large vase beside the casket. I’ve never seen turquoise blue butterflies in Kansas before – and I have not seen them since that day. It’s my very special sign from God that everything is alright – with me – and with my mom.
Oh – did I mention that the dress my mom wanted to be buried in was a turquoise blue dress? Did I also mention that turquoise blue was her favorite color? And – all of my family and friends honored that sweet woman by wearing turquoise blue to her graveside service. Yes – God made sure those butterflies were the perfect color. Don’t even try to persuade me that there is no God – and that He does not care deeply for His children. I know better. 🙂