INTERNATIONAL BEREAVED MOTHER’S DAY

TL BEREAVED MOTHER'S DAY

So they sat down with him upon the ground seven days and seven nights, and none spake a word unto him: for they saw that his grief was very great.  – Job 2:13

This day was created in 2010 and it now falls on the first Sunday of May.  The movement is meant to honor the memory of children called to heaven.  It’s also a support of sorts for grieving mothers.  It’s one thing to have tragedy strike and lose a child, but it’s another to feel alone in your grief.

Parental grief is intense, long-lasting, and complex. The grief and the healing process contain similar elements for all bereaved parents.  Finding others in similar situations will help you move forward, but don’t let anyone rush you through the healing process.

You’re not alone.  If you think you are, click on the You Tube video, the Carly Marie Project Heal website, the facebook event page or the blog on BlogSpot.com.  I invite you to connect with any of these folks because the worst thing you can do is grieve alone.  Grieving with others online is really unique in that you can say as much as you want to – and back away and be alone when you need to be alone.  The support is there for you when you need it.

https://youtu.be/1YdYS2bDjcI

http://carlymarieprojectheal.com/2012/05/international-bereaved-mothers-day.html

https://www.facebook.com/events/662766127106038/

http://internationalbabylostmothersday.blogspot.com/

I believe there is a special place in God’s heart reserved for those who have dealt with the loss of a child, or childlessness for any reason.  If I had a nickel for every time I’ve heard someone say that it’s not natural for a parent to outlive their child, well – let’s just say I’d be wealthy.

Although we know in our minds that Mother’s Day is the day to show honor and respect for our own mother, I know it’s still a very difficult time for the childless.  Some years I can’t go to church on Mother’s Day.  Those who love me understand.  Those who don’t – well, I guess they don’t understand.

BLESS ME IN THIS PLACE

Take a moment to say a prayer for the childless, particularly the ones who lost children in death and are left here to search for purpose and meaning in life.

May God Himself bless you with comfort for your soul as only He can. 

 

 

I STILL BELIEVE AS I GRIEVE

TL I STILL BELIEVE AS I GRIEVE6

Today I wish my parents a happy wedding anniversary in heaven.  My folks were married at a judge’s office here in Kansas.  My mom’s brother and sister-in-law stood up with them.  It goes to show that the expense and fanfare of a big wedding is not necessary to ensure the marriage is a success.

The things we do outlast our mortality…  They’re like the pyramids that the Egyptians built to honor the pharaohs.  Only instead of being made of stone, they’re made out of the memories people have of you.  – R.J. Palacio

We used to celebrate together.  I used to take them to dinner or take a cake to the house.  In 1976 I bought them an anniversary clock – for their 30th anniversary.  We made some precious memories and they are more precious now.

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Mom & Dad’s 27th Wedding Anniversary

When their anniversary fell on a Sunday, we went to church and then to the Bonanza restaurant for lunch.  Truth be told, most Sundays we headed for the Bonanza for lunch after morning worship service.

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Mom & Dad’s 33rd Wedding Anniversary

 

I hope they would be pleased with me today.  They taught me so much about living and loving.

Thank you mom and dad for all the lessons you taught me.  Thank you for giving me a model for marriage and showing me how it should work.  In a time when people choose to walk away instead of work on relationships, thank you for teaching me how to compromise and love another person more than I love myself.

Thank you for showing me every day that having purpose and meaning in life increases well-being and satisfaction.  To love another person completely will ultimately make me more happy than expecting love from him.

Thank you for instilling Christian values in me because God is the source of love.  I know if God is in the midst of marriage, it will be successful.  🙂

 

ECCLESIASTES 3:11 ON 3/11

ECCLESIASTES 3 11 ON 3 11

Have you ever had to pray the most difficult prayer?  It’s the one that begins with, “Lord, change me!”

He has made everything beautiful in its time. Also, he has put eternity into man’s heart, yet so that he cannot find out what God has done from the beginning to the end.  – Ecclesiastes 3:11

Often times we get wrapped up in dreams for the future that may or may not come to pass.  I wonder how healthy it is for us to put so much stock in what might not come to pass.  Maybe it’s better to do our best to enjoy today since  the Bible makes it quite clear that we are not promised tomorrow.  God makes everything beautiful in its time – not in our time.

Everything really does happen for a reason.  Just because we don’t understand the reason doesn’t mean that God doesn’t understand and have a plan.  We get hung up on the questions when things aren’t going our way – questions that usually begin with “why” – Why was I born this way?  Why did my mom treat me like that?  Why did I have to be left alone?  Why couldn’t I be a mother?  Why did You have to take my babies?  It’s exhausting.

We have to come to a point where we give up the WHY questions and lift our hands to the sky and declare that God is God.  He is the wise, omnipotent, omnipresent God of the universe who knows everything.  He alone knows how different my life would have been if I had been a mom.  I don’t pretend to know anything.  I have to call a cease-fire on the war with God because it’s a war I can’t win.  To be honest I’m too old and too tired to keep fighting it.  I surrender all – and I mean ALL to God.  The ultimate surrender is when the why questions stop.

It’s clear that beauty, whether it is beauty in thought or beautiful happenings, come from God above.  That brings the first part of the verse closer together.  And once we trust God to be Lord of our life, He definitely puts the desire in us to know Him better.

How do we know God better?  It’s not complicated.  Read God’s Word, the Holy Bible, and talk with God.  Pray to Him and make sure you listen for His answers.  Don’t be angry if you don’t understand His answers.  Just raise your hands and tell God that He is God – and you are not.

Remember that while we are focused on the external, God is focused on the internal.  While we see today, He is working on eternity.  We focus on the gift bag and He focuses on the gift inside.  He makes all things beautiful in His time – including the losses, the brokenness, the battles, the fragmented dreams, lost romance, heartache and chronic illness.

Without Him, life is purposeless and profitless, miserable and meaningless. With Him, it will ultimately make sense.  🙂

A COMMENTARY FROM THE HEART

TL A COMMENTARY FROM THE HEART (15)

MAYBE IT'S TIME

 There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven: a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance, a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain, a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away, a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak, a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace. – Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

This passage of scripture brings up some questions in my mind. What happened to the commandment Thou shalt not kill? If there is a time to kill, does that give us permission to do so? Is that meant to be taken literally? Well, there is war in our world and that involves killing. It’s unfortunate that we are familiar with it, but there it is.

When I graduated high school in 1980, I set a goal to be on Johnny Carson’s The Tonight Show within ten years.  Through early 1990, I auditioned eight times and was turned away at each.  Only after my ninth turn – two months before my tenth high school reunion – did I appear on Carson for the first time.  During those years, Jim McCawley, Carson’s talent booker, kept saying something that was incredibly frustrating, but which I later would fully appreciate:  “When performing for Johnny Carson, it’s better to be five years late than one day early.”  It’s not being at the right place at the right time, but rather about being prepared when the time arrives.  – Jeff Dunham

Yes, it’s important to be prepared for all things, but the point of this passage is that God has everything in His control. I happen to be a person who believes that if it is your “TIME” to die, it doesn’t matter whether you are wrapped snuggly in your bed or flying around in the clouds in an airplane. If God wants to call you home, He will.

God’s timing is not our timing – not even close. Whether we understand God’s perfect timing or not, we have to trust that He knows what is best for us in the long run. He sees down the road and we don’t see past our noses.

There are things we can do while trying to understand God’s timing. When was the last time you took your favorite person out on a date? It doesn’t have to be anything expensive, just a little quality time. These things make our Lord smile. He likes marriage – it was His idea. Go out and enjoy LIFE with someone you love today.

MERRY CHRISTMAS

TL MERRY CHRISTMAS

THE STAR STAYS
A culture Christmas is cold, commercialized and calculated.  Everyone is all about the bottom line financially.  How much will retailers make this year?  Profit margins and being in the black are the most important aspects of a culture Christmas.  No wonder it leaves non-Christians feeling cold and wanting.

To lean heavily on the mere traditions of Christmas is to miss the mark and to miss the meaning. If we are so wrapped up in the “doing” part of Christmas, we miss the “being”, the present that God wants for all of us to receive. He wants us to see His Son, Jesus. Celebrate His birthday and be grateful that He came to save the world. There is no greater gift than that. No new technological gizmo can top that!

A culture Christmas will have you on an emotional “high” for just a little while, getting all wrapped up in the glitz and glitter, the rushing and the flitting here and hurry there. It is fun and folly for a short time. Unfortunately, the result of that sort of celebration leaves you empty inside. When you indulge the carnal folly of Christmas, you end up with an empty soul and a sad credit card statement. Most people just over-spend and it takes the rest of the year to get the debt paid off – if it gets paid off.

There’s a better way to approach Christmas. It begins with pure simplicity and a level logic. It’s not based on external folly, but internal wisdom that will rule your heart. It is not a fleeting happiness, but a deep sense of peace and joy that will remain in your heart long after the last Christmas decoration has been put away for the year. Christ Himself wants to inhabit your heart and fill you will joy unspeakable and full of glory. He alone can replace the carnal desires with real peace and contentment that allow you to see beyond all the frills and fluff of a culture Christmas – to a personal celebration between you and Him.

For a Christian, Christmas is simply Thanksgiving all over again. We keep the same attitude of gratitude, adding our eternal thanks for the birth of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. While we know that His birth is what we are celebrating, many of us also have a Christmas tree and exchange gifts. The difference is that we know in our hearts that God gave us the greatest gift of all, Jesus!

RED ROSE DAY

TL 6-12 RED ROSE DAY

https://youtu.be/-CVCvqZMFgo

There is not a flower that has more symbolism attached to it than the rose. Sending the right color, or combination of colors, or even the right number of roses can send the perfect message – or the wrong one.

Though not readily available, a lilac colored rose is seen as mystical . They symbolize enchantment and desire. The lilac and deeper purple roses send the message that you are attracted to the mystery in a woman and want to get to know her better.

I planted orange roses in my front garden. The lovely light and dark shades symbolize enthusiasm and desire. The message these roses send is one of excitement and underlying passion. They’re so pretty! They look energetic and almost animated when there is a breeze blowing.

The pink rose represents delicacy, fragility and gentility. The feminine refinement of a cameo rose conveys a certain grace and gentleness and is right for letting someone know you’re happy with them but not necessarily in love with them. The darker shade of pink conveys gratitude and appreciation for a job well done with a slight undertone of interest romantically.

One of my favorite roses is the yellow rose. The color yellow is recognized as the color of joy. In Victorian times the yellow rose symbolized jealousy and envy but today it is known as the friendship rose. Yellow roses are perfect if warmth, gladness with a touch of affection is the message you wish to convey. If you want to express joy and happiness at some good news, send both red and yellow roses.

Part of my family’s tradition centers around white roses. In Scotland, when the white rose bloomed in autumn, it was seen as a token of early marriage. Known as the bridal rose, a white rose symbolizes innocence and purity. Humility and loyalty are the message they send – they say “I am worthy of you.” In my family, white roses were used not only in weddings, but at funerals as well. All the white roses represented the family that had passed over, while red roses represented those still living. White and red roses combined mean unity.

Since today is RED ROSE DAY, we should talk some about them. A red rose is the most romantic of all the roses. They hold such rich symbolism and represent such virtues as confidentiality, affection and yes, love. A bouquet of one dozen red roses traditionally conveys a strong romantic message.

Just as the color of rose matters, so does the type of rose you send. A tea rose of any color expresses the sentiment “I will always remember you”. A bouquet of rosebuds means innocent love or young love. One single red rose says “I still love you”. That is the perfect gift to give a woman after a disagreement. If you throw in a box of chocolates you get bonus points. ❤