Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one’s definition of your life; define yourself. – Harvey Fierstein
I’ve tried to put myself in the mindset of a bully. I’ve tried to understand where they are coming from. I will never understand, no matter how long I live, how one human being can esteem themselves somehow BETTER or more entitled to something than another human being! We are ALL God’s children!!!
Bullying stems from a poor sense of self. If a person’s own self-esteem is shaky, they will do anything they can to intimidate someone else (or try to) to stroke their own precious ego and raise their self-esteem. What they do not realize; however, is that the attempt to hurt another person is not going to change their own perception of themselves – not one bit!!!
The road to change is never an external journey – it ALWAYS begins within. Don’t look to other people and try to change them to feel better about yourself! Work on you and leave others alone. I will work on me. I will not try to be better in any way than anyone – except myself.
We are all on different paths. Once we realize it’s not a race, we will begin to coexist in harmony. When I’m tempted to blow another person’s candle out to make mine shine brighter, I think of a saying I heard one time. When you blow someone’s candle out, it does not make yours shine brighter. To be a bully is to be a coward. Bullies lack the necessary tools to negotiate in a mature and civilized manner. They have a limited vocabulary and weak social skills. Bullies are losers.
I hope you will join me – wear PINK today on NATIONAL PINK DAY!!!
“Pretending and ignoring are two different things.” I was 15 when I heard this, checked in to a stress center after swallowing a potentially lethal dose of sleeping pills. I’d told my best friend I was born HIV positive. Classmates called me names and left mean notes on my locker. I was told to ignore my bullies, which I’d done. But as one of the center’s counselors explained, sometimes you think you’re ignoring hurtful behavior when you’re just pretending. “Were you hurt, Paige?” the counselor asked. Yes. I’d been hurt again and again. It was terrifying to admit; would acknowledging that mean my bullies had won? No. It allowed me to move on. Admitting I was hurt was the only thing that freed me from the pain. – Paige Rawl
Bullying does happen – more than we know. Often times the victim has been so emotionally beaten down they are afraid to either fight back or tell anyone about what they are going through.
If you knew that someone was being bullied, would you help? What would you do? Be attune to the signs of abuse. Not all signs are physical. There are certain behaviors that are telltale signs that abuse is taking place. The ones being bullied are usually:
Isolated– Often one of the first signs that a person is being abused is isolation. Obviously if the abuse is physical, the person will not want to go out in public and certainly will not want to have to explain injuries to their friends. It’s just easier to be isolated from the world.
Withdrawn– Similar to isolation, but when a person withdraws they cease to have opinions or engage in intelligent conversation. They are in survival mode and “small talk” seems unimportant and trivial to them.
Emotional– This is like manic depression. Emotions seem to be all over the map. Because with verbal abuse in particular, a person can be brought from a normal mood into a deep depression in seconds with what has been said to them. Words hurt as much as hits do, and the scars run deep. If they are told that they are stupid or ugly or worthless after so long, they begin to buy into it. These little things affect their self-perception eventually. Sometimes when they are taken away from the abuser, they can actually feel a type of “high” and be over the top emotionally and almost giddy.
For the sake of awareness, let’s wear pink and support the effort to STOP BULLYING!!! ❤